Make A Business Plan For Your Marriage Post It On The Fridge

Make A Business Plan For Your Marriage & Post It On The Fridge

In working with companies to create business plans, I always start with a conversation about goal setting. How could you possibly create a business plan without a goal to achieve by working the plan? Clients are taught to create milestones to measure success along the way and they are held accountable for doing tasks to achieve each milestone. Tracking activities to reach the goals is critical. But before any of that can occur they have to dream.

Step One: Dream

When given the task of “goal setting” people typically start with an amount of money they’d like to earn. Sometimes they’ll have a clear idea of what they will do with that money, sometimes they just choose a dollar amount because they think they are supposed to do that.

In business there is an old story that’s been recycled for years about a graduating class from Harvard. On graduation day when the class was asked “do you have clearly written goals?” only 3% responded “yes”. Ten years later, the same group of people were assessed. The 3% that had clearly written goals were worth more than the other 97% of the class combined. Humm… I can’t think of any reasons not to set goals, just in case that story is accurate!

The key to goal setting is to be as specific as possible and create milestones to measure along the way to make sure you are on the right path working toward a longer term achievement. For example, if your goal is to earn more money, you first have to be more specific. How much money will you earn, by when will you earn it? What do you have to do to get there? Look for a new job? Ask for a raise? Sell a new account? Go back to school and finish your degree? What steps do you need to take to get to the earnings goal? Create a plan to move through each step with a timeline attached.

Step Two: Set Goals Together

Two things are important regarding goal setting as a couple. Number one, it’s fine to set individual goals, but you must share them with your spouse and make sure they fit with their goals. You both might want to earn a lot of money, but if one of you is working to earn money to send kids to college and the other is working to earn money to travel first class all over the world without kids, you both have nice dreams, but you may be out of whack as a couple.

My recommendation is to dream on your own first. It’s important that you discover what is important to you and share that with your partner. If you skip that part and go directly to step two, the more vocal or determined of the partnership will dominate the conversation and the other will go along with their goals, simply because they don’t have any other dreams to include in the master plan.

Setting goals together is an on-going activity. Check in with your partner on a consistent basis to see if their ideal dream today is the same as the plan they shared years (or months) ago.

Step Three: Create Your Dream in Pictures

It’s important to dream together in pictures. Most people on the planet are highly “visual” meaning, they think in pictures. When you are dreaming, dream big and allow your subconscious mind the opportunity to play along by creating a visual display of pictures of your dreams. The mind thinks and processes information in pictures. If you want to train your mind to deliver what you want, do it in pictures.

Why this isn’t a “no brainer” in a marital partnership I will never know. Why people are surprised to learn after years of marriage that one spouse wants to travel the world and the other dreams of spending free time visiting with family doesn’t make any sense. Dream together. Dream in pictures. Discuss your goals and plans together. If you are not on the same page, decide if it’s worth fighting for or if you want it because you think you should based on what we’ve been taught by society and the media.

Save some old magazines for an evening of cutting & pasting to create your dream in pictures. As you cut out a photo, describe to your partner why you chose that for your visual display. When you agree together on all the photos for your joint picture board you are ready to paste them onto a piece of cardboard to make a collage of dreams.

The most important part of creating the picture board of your dreams together is taping it to your refrigerator to remind each other everyday that you are working together toward a common dream. Keeping your dreams present makes it easier to stay connected to what’s important to you as a couple. Companies create business plans and hang mission statements in their lobby area to keep them focused, couples create picture boards for the fridge.

BONUS : Make Your Groomsmen Gifts As Individual As They Are

Who made up the rule that groomsmen gifts have to be the same for each groomsman? When everything else about your wedding day is unique to you and your fiancé, how about making each gift you give unique to the loved ones you have standing at your side.

Give some thought to what kind of guys your best pals are, and plan a gift accordingly.

For the Sportsman
If he never misses a game, if his only change of wardrobe involves switching teams when a season ends, if people come to him for advice on the office sports pool, this man will be especially touched by a groomsman gift that feeds his obsession. How about a personalized stadium blanket or cooler to bring to the game ? Monogrammed baseball bat or chip bowls, beer mugs with his favorite team, or stadium radio/binoculars (where you can watch the game live and hear the local play-by-play at the same time) will have him thinking of you every time he yells, “Booyah!”

For the Urban Professional
This man is on the go, making the world go round with his stock trades, contract negotiations or international deals. Show him you care with leather—in the form of an embossed briefcase, a card holder or a money clip. Travel items would also be especially appreciated, such as a leather encased travel clock, jewelry box or grooming kit. A smooth rich leather surface on any item adds a mark of distinction that your groomsman can be proud to display from the board room to the bedroom.

For the College Buddy
Lots a memories between the two of you? Then how about a college-themed photo album filled with all those shots neither of you want anyone else to see? You’ll laugh together remembering old times when you were both single, and appreciate even more still being friends as you start your families. A case of your favorite libation from back then, along with tickets to the next home game will sweeten the deal and set you on the road to creating even more memories.

For the Family Man
He may be way ahead of you here, with a wife and kids already—and he’s loving every minute of it. Show him you admire his achievement by giving family-oriented items that enable him to spend more quality time with those he loves. Tickets to sporting events, ski resort reservations or camping equipment will be fun for the whole family, and he’ll enjoy it even more knowing it came from you.

For the Rebel
Is his Harley his second home? Is his hair longer than his significant other’s? Are the tattoos outnumbering his teeth? Consider distinctive gifts such as a leather poker set for late nights with the gang or an embossed shoe-shine kit for his leather boots. Gift certificates to music stores or motorcycle shops would go over well, along with personalized silver or gold jewelry. Have him roaring down the road in style.

For the Never-Without-a-Book Guy
The bestseller list is made by guys like these. Fascinated with the world around him, he stays abreast of all the current trends through reading the latest from the world’s most well-known authors. It might be hard to get this guy a book that he doesn’t already have, but you can be sure to please with a generous gift certificate to his favorite local or online bookstore. Include wedding themed nameplates for adhering in the books when he gets them, and it’ll be like you’re as up-to-the-minute as he is.

For the Metrosexual
Hey, we all know that grooming is essential for a groomsman. But some groomsmen take this duty more seriously than others with sharp attention to detail every day of the year. How about a luxurious facial kit in a travel bag, an elegant sterling silver shaving brush, or an engraved manicure set? Just be sure you look as good as he does on your wedding day.

The whole point of groomsmen gifts is the same as the point of your friendships—have fun with them. You can’t go wrong when you show them how important to you they are with a unique groomsmen gift that’s just for them.