The Man S Way To Finding True Love

The Man's Way To Finding True Love

Every one of us is looking for an ideal partner, the person who fulfils our need to love and be loved. The problem is there are so many people who can pass the first-glance test that you can be looking your whole life and not know who to select. So how can you end up with an ideal partner who’ll love you with all her heart? This article leads the way.

(In the Garden of Eden)
Eve: Adam, do you love me?
Adam: Who else?

Every day you go out, you see hundreds of attractive people. A hot-blooded male in his younger days may think, “I can go with her…or her… or her. Arrgh! How do I decide?” As a man grows older, if he is fortunate enough, he learns how to look beyond exterior beauty because all women are beautiful nowadays, aren’t they? So it can give a man one big headache to identify a woman who is truly compatible with him in mind, body, and soul. Women understand that men are born to think with their smaller heads. So being the intelligent creatures they are – they use visual stimulus to appeal to the male instinct. Thus a man, who does not make fine distinctions into character and personality, may find that many women appeal to him. But if he learns to go a step further and say, “Yes, she’s attractive to me. But what’s she all about?” Then he goes beyond seeing women as visual objects, and more as people.

*Desire is bad for you?*
The attraction between men and women is biological, it’s inherited and it’s unstoppable. You don’t need to make an excuse for your desire. One reason why we do not approach those who are attractive to us is because we are religiously and culturally programmed to believe desire is ‘baaaad’. A pious man who has the opportunity to meet an attractive woman may tell himself, “No! I must not give in to temptation! The desire is too strong!” But really, it’s just an excuse for himself because he’s afraid of rejection. And unless he can come to terms with his desire – see it as a guiding force, rather than an urge to be suppressed – he may never end up with a woman he truly wants. Members of the opposite sex, who are more genetically compatible with you, will spur a greater sense of desire in you. It’s natural. If you suppress the biological instinct when selecting a partner… you probably won’t have a happy sex life.

*Men and Women: Not So Different *
People like to believe that men and women are really different, but by nature they aren’t. We grow up imagining the opposite sex is some great mystery because everything about them seems different, and so we think it’s difficult to talk to the opposite sex. But really, men and women are very similar. They are anatomically different, but it’s not that big a difference. The human sexual organs are simply the inverse of each other. Penis and clitoris are made from the same embryological tissue. Male seeds hang outside (testicles), while female seeds are kept inside (ovaries). It’s just one big reversal. What forces the difference is the action of testosterone.

“Okay then,” you say. “What about the difference in the way men and women think? They don’t like the same things; they don’t talk the same, walk the same or wear the same clothes!” (Well… actually some do.)

Although men and women act differently, that’s not so much a biological instinct as it is a cultural role they are taught to play. Men don’t automatically love soccer, beer drinking, or going to the gym – they are culturally programmed to adopt these behaviours because it brings them greater social approval.

“A man who does not watch soccer is not ‘one of the boys’; a man who does not drink beer is not real man; a man who’s muscular earns the respect of his peers and is more attractive to women.”

These are beliefs so deeply ingrained into us that people might tell you it’s a fact, just like how women learn about the importance of being beautiful from magazines, television, and friends. What creates such a great difference in thinking and behaviour is not nature, but the enculturation of newborns into their gender roles. Blue for boys, pink for girls; toss the boys around, but be gentle with the girls. From young, everything about our culture teaches the sexes to differentiate themselves. From the clothes we wear to whether we can fart in public.

Being too focused on the exterior of a person, you only see the physical and cultural difference – the accessories and behaviours created to differentiate the sexes. But look past the surface and you’ll see that each person, male or female, is subject to the same laws of emotion, logic, reason, and motivation. They have wants and desires, dislikes and hates; they communicate through language; they have two eyes, one nose, one mouth, two ears, ten fingers and ten toes. They have much more in common than they do in difference. So it is a folly to believe it is difficult to relate to the opposite sex. Just talk to them as you would any casual person, and you’ll see that even the most attractive person is easy to chat with.

*Being Worthy*
Women will choose the men they want to be with. And if a guy doesn’t believe that, he might as well bury his head in the sand (hide from reality). A man should not worry about trying to ‘get a woman’ – she will choose the man she wants. What he should worry about, and it is his business to focus on this… is becoming the best that he can be – in mind, body, spirit; socially, financially, and emotionally. In raising his standard of himself, he will naturally attract the kind of woman he’s been looking for. Understand that these women are also looking for him, but not that old sloppy version of him, they want the new well-groomed, emotionally and financially secure, entertaining and warm-hearted man, where they can lie safely in his arms, protected from a harsh and crazy world. This makes women seem superficial, but understand that their biological instinct is to select a male who can protect, nurture, and entertain at the same time.

*Love is a commitment*
To sustain love, two people have to choose each other. If either partner defaults or is unsure, the whole relationship falls apart. It doesn’t matter how much you love the other person, if they do not return your love. This reminds me of those Chinese drama serials where they are so fond of saying, “Ai Qing Shi Bu Neng Mian Qiang De” – translated it means ‘you can’t force love’. And this will be the time when the male suitor will grip his head and cry, “Why! Why?!!” Then he has no alternative, but to drown his sorrows in drink, and maybe get knocked down by a truck. Then the girl will visit him in hospital, where with his dying breath he whispers his last words of undying love… then he dies.

A great love relationship is not something you find, but something you build and commit yourself to. There are tons of beautiful people in the world and many who will seem more attractive to you than your partner. To some people, the grass is always greener on the other side. So what do they do? They hop over to the neighbour’s lawn! But then the lawn doesn’t seem so green anymore… but it looks like there’s a greener one next door, so they hop again! They do their partner hopping, dating and exchanging, in search of the greenest lawn, but they’ll never find it because a beautiful relationship, like a beautiful garden, must be tended to and cared for. You can have ‘happily forever after’ with the girl you choose, but you must commit yourself to it. Without commitment, nothing lasts.

*An Uncommitted Partner*
Sometimes you might find that although you are ready to commit, your partner doesn’t seem to want to settle. Women have commitment problems too, you know? She may be on the lookout for the ideal guy who can fulfil her whims and fantasies… some idealistic vision of what a man should be. What you can do in this case, is not to give up hope yet, but put your full effort into convincing her you’re the man of her dreams. Pull out your Ferrari, your 5Cs, your love potion – everything and anything. If all else fails, then step back and realize that she has her own dreams and ideals. And as a man who still cares for her, the best you can do is allow her to follow her dreams. Gracefully step aside and wish her well. The right girl will come along for you one day.

If you want to find an ideal partner, you first have to be an ideal partner. A man does not have to worry about chasing women if he’s focused on being the best he can be. By turning himself into an attractor rather than an attacker, he lifts himself above the neediness and hunger most men portray. Women are naturally attracted to him because he fulfils what they want in a man. He’s not afraid to talk to women because he sees them as people rather than sexual objects. When he feels a woman fits his ideal, he chases her with everything he’s got. If she loves him and will commit to him, they stay together. If she wants someone else, he lets her go and carries on with his life knowing that he’s doing what’s best for both of them. The best partner is not one you win over, but one who chooses you and loves you with all her heart. Remember that.

BONUS : The Mentality Of Women In Kazakhstan

Kazakhstan is situated in Central Asia and borders on Russia and China. It’s a multi-cultural and multi-national state. One of the main and biggest cities in the country is Almaty. Tourists visiting this amazing city are amazed by its main heritage and possession – beautiful women of different ethnic backgrounds that honour and preserve their culture and traditions.

It's important to know some historical facts as well. Kazakhstan during the centuries has been greatly influenced by diversity of Eastern and Western lifestyles, and two biggest in the country Muslim and Orthodox confessions. The state language here is considered to be Kazakh – one of the Turkic group tongues, though Russian is the language that is widely spoken and used by the population.

Kazakh and Russian ethnic groups are definitely the majority. All other national minorities also have their firm positions in the state. According to the “Wall Street Journal” this country is an example of ethnic and religious tolerance throughout the whole Asian region.

Russian and Asiatic cultures have created a unique synthesis of being here. The ladies greatly influenced by diverse of ethnic colours are extremely attractive, unusual, smart and proactive. There is a common understanding of women in this area: European and Eastern types. Orient girls are well known for their mysterious look and men honouring; European background ladies - for their brightness and good treating of their husbands. All the ladies here are very well-mannered, charming and elegant; they all share their values and love secrets with each other. However, the most important is that they all are family focused from their childhood. For all of those girls, coming from ethnically different families one is unchangeable – traditionally their mothers raise them up keep telling that family is the most precious value in the world. That’s why all Russian girls make their best efforts and investments for the family creation.

Western gentlemen coming to Kazakhstan and meeting the Russian girls for the first time can’t hide their amusement of how much sincere, kind, understanding and caring they are. The ladies here like to do things regarding housing with their own hands, no matter if they work or not. They pretty much like to raise their kids and cook for their husbands. When talking about love, any of these sweet girls can tell you how much they are inspired to meet a man of their dream and fall in a greatest ever love with him!

Some real stories happened to the guys kept them endlessly happy about meeting their online brides here, in girls’ home-town. The men had a chance to witness their ladies’ being in so usual and natural for them environment.

Every man, after several months of correspondence with the one he finally found for love and family creation wants to see his future wife in everyday life. At the same time, he accounts to get some understanding of fiancee’s national roots, lifestyle of the country she grew up in, etc. Of course, such an approach to serious relationships is important. It’s a best way of acquaintance for a mixed couple, coming from different cultures and mentalities. The gentlemen who visit their brides before the marriage, after attending her home know what difficulties their Russian girl can face in his homeland. Of course, it’s easy to guess that their relationships can benefit a lot from such an experience.

First of all it makes the couple closer spiritually, and secondly, it prevents men from any sort of misunderstanding and mistreating of their spouses. For this reason “Oksanalove” often hosts grooms in the agency’s Almaty branch. During such tours guys don’t stop getting excited and after, they just forget they had some doubts about the rightness of their choice.

The most memorable examples of fiance hosting is still something amazing to talk about in the “Oksanalove” agency. It’s the stories about how guys were impressed by the hospitality of their future wives and how their brides even exceeded all of their expectations. They were completely puzzled by the fact that their fiancees can be so gorgeously beautiful and at the same time be just good housewives who cook, do the laundry, clean and take care of their men – simultaneously doing all these things.

Usually, when guys come to Kazakhstan to see their Russian-speaking future wives, the girls go meeting them at the airport. This is what happened to one of Oksanalove's couple. When an American man came to Almaty for a face-to-face date with his bride. First of all, it’s worth mentioning that this girl lives in Karaganda – a northern Kazakhstan city, she also came to Almaty to meet her online groom. While waiting for a driver to pick her up from the apartment that was especially rented for the couple’s first date, she went shopping to get products for cooking. The bride was so keen by this; she so much wanted to make a surprise for her man that she forgot she may be late with her shower and other girl things. But Kazakhstan women are always lucky with this they can be inventive and get on well with everything. She made time to finish all the stuff and look fantastic, except of the fact that she didn’t manage to dry her beautiful long hair. She thought never mind and went out in a cold winter night to ride a car and meet her groom in the airport. Nobody has seen her so beautiful before that night when she dried her hair towards the heater in the driver’s car. When she told about her adventurous date preparation to her man he was just amazed and completely charmed! This wonderful and loving couple is very happy in their marriage.

Another nice and pretty lady every single day has cooked delicious meals at her home and was bringing them to her future husband in his hotel room when he was on his tour to Almaty. Such attitude never leaves people indifferent. That’s for sure! The fact is that, in comparison with girls from such cosmopolitans as Moscow, Kiev or Odessa that usually loaded with foreigners, Almaty is not so popular among them due to its remote geographical position. Local girls are not really spoiled by attention of travelers and their exquisite treating. All of the Almaty girls who grew up under hot Almaty sun in a friendly and specific multi-cultural environment are warm, passionate and unique. They all look for someone to give all their love and care sharing with their values.