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No Hunny You Look Great

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No Hunny, You Look Great

"Am I fat?" Don't even start with me. I thought that dreadful lose-lose question was a part of history! "Do these jeans make my butt look big?" - "No hunny, your butt makes those pants look big". Why do women still insist on puting men in this ridiculus situation? And it isn't as though we can just say "I refuse to answer", because then you came up with "Geez, you don't even care about how i feel". Wow.

Look ladies, guys arent the only ones with eyes. You know just as well as us if something makes your butt look fat. This is me, making a request for all guys out there - DON'T ASK US THAT! Instead, try something like "aw, I'm fat", so that we can come back and tell you that you are not. This way, everyone wins. Your happy, we're happy, and the divorce rate drops 10 fold.

Moving right along. Ladies, if you are overweight, do something! don't complain, just get rid of the excess. There are tons and tons of ways to lose weight, so pick one! This is one more of those win-win situations. After you lose some weight, your happy, we're happy, and Jenny Craig is wealthy.

So lets review... No asking us if your fat.... No complaining if you ARE overweight (And if you are, chose from one of the million ways to lose weight)..... And have a happy relashionship! Look, most guys just want to have fun. We clearly don't like fighting, and girls shouldnt either, so lets get along, ad remember everything you read here today!
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BONUS : No Prince Charming - You’ve Got To Be Kidding Me

It all started with, “Once upon a time there lived a noble gentleman who had a little girl.”

Stop right there and rewind! Before we get to the end of this story, where two people go off and live a fairy tale life, I have to tell you that there is no Prince Charming.

The sooner that we ladies wake up and realize that, the better life will be.

The average woman spends her life waiting for that perfect man, the one who completes her. He’s the one for whom she would not only give her heart, but her life. She keeps hoping and praying that Prince Charming will ride up on his horse and sweep her off her feet, and then they’ll ride off together and live happily ever after.

What you see in movies and read in books isn’t what real relationships are about.

The perfect man isn't out there. Do you want to know why he isn’t out there? Because, he doesn’t exist! In my opinion, there is no such thing as perfect. Like every woman, each man has his flaws, his weaknesses, and his strengths. How can a woman expect a perfect man, when we as women are not perfect?

In the movie, “The Perfect Man” Holly Hamilton (played by Hillary Duff) creates the illusion of "the perfect man" for her single mother, Jean Hamilton (played by Heather Locklear) who believes that she needs a man to be complete. Along the way Holly and Jean both learn that life isn’t really all that simple. Of course the movie is flawed because she winds up with a guy in the end. Go figure!

But my point in all of this is: Ladies true happiness comes from within and while you are busy searching for that perfect man; you could be missing out on someone very special.

There may be such a thing as true love, but you won’t find it kissing frogs. He won’t be placing a glass slipper on your foot and he won’t say the right words and do the right things all the time.

Quit dreaming about fairy tales and start living your life. As one learns to see one’s self more clearly, she will see others more clearly. Don’t be influenced by images and illusion.

Life's funny that way. We spend so much time searching for a Prince. We have to ask ourselves if we are looking for love while blindfolded? A successful relationship is hard work and it takes commitment from both parties to make it last a lifetime. Remember that we all have faults and we all have short comings. Sometimes you just have to meet somewhere in the middle.

While there may be no such thing as a true "Prince Charming" and life isn’t quite like you dreamed as a child. There certainly may be a man out there that can be the next best thing.

Ok, start the story. “Once upon a time there lived a noble gentleman who had a little girl.”

I bet you can’t wait to see the ending.
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