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Is It Worth It To Enter Relationship Counseling

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Is It Worth It To Enter Relationship Counseling

When it comes to counseling, the one that is most called upon is relationship counseling. Out of every twenty couples, 17 of them have underwent some form of relationship counseling. With good reason, too, since relationships tend to be counter intuitive. Counselors who specialize in relationships have helped couples to live happier and more fulfilled.

To dispel the myths surrounding relationship counseling, it is important to know that it is not about winning or losing or placing blame. The central focus of the counseling is to develop the communication skills needed to learn from your partner and balance your needs with theirs. Blame only helps to alienate and push you partner away. A lot of the problems that cause us to pull our hair out are in fact nothing that is worth getting too angry about, but it takes an outside party to realize it.

Relationship counseling also puts both into a controlled environment where they can vent and get everything out in a safe way. The counselor sets the guidelines and rules the force and enable civilized discussion. Now that is not to say that what works for one couple will work for another. Some couples need a mediator, someone who just listens on the sides. This counselor will set guidelines for communication, allowing the couple to talk things out themselves.

Other couples need someone who will guide the discussion. Attempts to work things out on their own quickly degrades into yelling matches and bare knuckle arguments. Relationship counseling here aims to guide the conversation and not let it get out of hand or uncontrollable. Over all, there is a variety of couples who will need an equally variable number of counselors. Despite this, counseling is statistically certain to improve your relationship.

One of the things that needs to be learned is to identify and address the issues that threaten relationships. Unfortunately, the emotions and stresses that plagues relationships make it especially difficult to identify those issues. That is what relationship counseling is made to do. Counseling will identify the unique problems that prevent a couple from communicating, address the problems that are there and bring the couple to a place that will allow them to thrive.

You may think that your relationship will not be helped by relationship counseling. However, what should be kept in mind is that what is good for a relationship is not something that would seem logical. Counseling can only be help relationships. They enable the free flow of information and communication so that problems existing below the surface can be discovered and addressed.

If you are one of the three out of twenty who can find happiness without entering relationship counseling, then more power to you. You have found something that enables you to communicate and discuss your problems, then you are well ahead of the curve. But if you are one of the 17 out of twenty, then you will find that relationship counseling will improve the quality and happiness in your partnership.
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BONUS : Is Your Marriage in Crisis - How to Keep Hope Alive in Desperate Times

Is your marriage in crisis? Has your spouse said that the two of you have no future? Don’t give up yet. Every marriage goes through rough spots. Some relationships are even strengthened by these times. Here’s how to keep hope alive even when your marriage is in trouble.

First of all, you should know that if even one partner has hope for the relationship, the marriage in crisis can be saved. Many frustrated spouses have been known to reconsider their impulse to leave. Remember that he or she also has much invested in the relationship and will have second thoughts about leaving.

Next, realize that when a marriage is in crisis, people say extreme things. Don’t take these comments personally. In some cases, your spouse will feel guilty about asking for a divorce. When this happens, he or she may cover up their feelings of guilt by acting out in an angry manner. If you take that anger personally, you are further harming a marriage in crisis.

How you react to the situation will have a profound impact on how the marriage in crisis is resolved. Don’t badger a spouse who asks for more emotional space. Use this space to sort out your own emotions. In other words, back off, regroup, and prepare for the tough work ahead. What ever you do, don’t give in to anxiety and demand immediate answers to difficult questions.

Also, lower your expectations of your spouse during this time. Sometimes when a relationship is broken, a person becomes more critical of his or her spouse. If the housework isn’t perfect or someone gets home late from work, it’s not the end of the world. There are bigger issues to address right now.

You should allow yourself your own emotions as well. Don’t rush into decisions. Find some things which help to ground you. For instance, make sure that you work out regularly to keep your body balanced. Read, undertake individual therapy, or attend church to keep your mind and spirit in shape.

It is also a good time to expand your interests and activities. Many people who have a marriage in crisis focus in on their relationship like a laser beam. As you start enjoying your own life more, your spouse will become more interested in you.

Choose to remain positive. You can’t control what your spouse does, but you can control your reactions to him or her. When a marriage is in trouble, many people become insecure and depressed. These reactions only do a marriage in crisis more damage. Trust your ability to find a creative solution to your relationship difficulties.

Finally, you need to know that whatever the outcome, you did your best to resolve the issues at hand. Instead of playing the odds about whether the relationship will survive, do what you can to be helpful and loving to your spouse. That is how you rescue a marriage in crisis.
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