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Stop Procrastinating
Stop Scoring Own Goals > > >
Stop Procrastinating
Word Count:
1045
Summary:
This article gives you ten great ideas for successfully achieving your goals. If you struggle with accomplishing your goals, then you will learn something from this article.
Keywords:
goal setting
Article Body:
It has been said that 60-80% of New Years resolutions will be broken within the first two weeks. In other words, a lot of people have a hard time making the changes in their life they want to make. So you are not alone. Personally, I am not a huge advocate of New Years resolutions because I believe in setting and achieving personal goals all year around. That being said, I wanted to share with you the top ten ways to increase the likelihood for success with achieving your goals.
1. Stick to 1 or 2 important goals.
Having a laundry list of all the things you would like to change in your life can be overwhelming. Your chances for success are much higher if you stick to 1 or 2 of your most important goals. This allows you to concentrate all your energy and focus on these goals. Once you achieve those goals, you can always set 1 or 2 more.
2. Be realistic.
Its okay to think big and want the best, but it is more important to succeed, so be realistic. Ask yourself whether or not your goals are reasonable and possible. It is probably not realistic to set the goal of never yelling at your kids again. How will you feel about your resolution when your children test you on a very bad day and you yell? Certainly one can cut back on yelling and work to find alternative ways to deal with misbehavior, but an all or nothing attitude may set you up for failure, and feeling like youve failed can set you up for more failure. Instead, accept and honor your humanness.
3. Be specific.
Be as specific as possible when determining goals. Articulate how you will measure success and exactly what you are trying to achieve. Setting a goal to lose weight is too general. A better choice would be to set a specific and manageable goal. For example say, "I will lose 25 pounds by June 30, 2005." Be specific when answering the what, when and how.
4. Connect to your motivation for achieving your goal.
Why do you want to achieve this goal? Why now? Make sure your motivation comes from your heart, and not from your head. In other words, your goal should be something you really desire, and not something you know you SHOULD do. Really connect to why this is so important to you. Pay attention to whether or not you are being driven by fear or love. Beware of setting goals based on what someone else in your life thinks you should do. Your resolutions should come from your authentic self.
5. Examine your belief in your ability to achieve this goal.
What do you believe about your ability to achieve your goals? If you have tried to reach the same goal many times before without much success, your confidence could be wavering. You could be feeding yourself negative messages without even realizing it. Be conscious about positive thinking. Remind yourself that you are capable of doing anything you set your heart to. Tell yourself every day that you have the ability to take the steps it will take to reach your goal.
6. Create a detailed plan to achieve your goal.
Lets say your goal is to eliminate the clutter in your home. But how will you start when the clutter is overwhelming? It may be helpful to break large goals into intermediate, manageable steps. Make a list of each area you need to tackle. Then break each area into even smaller segments that can be tackled easily. For instance, set time aside to clean out old clothes, then to organize sweaters, then to throw out old shoes, and finally arrange clothing by color or type. Don't forget to specify a time limit for accomplishing each of the smaller steps. Before you know it, the larger goal will have been met.
7. Recognize that you may encounter obstacles.
Most people give up on their goals because they run into some type of obstacle along the way. Obstacles can be internal or external. Examples of internal obstacles include negative self-talk, limiting beliefs and discipline issues. Some external obstacles are the lack of time, money or resources. Know in advance what hurdles you may have to conquer.
8. Identify a plan of action to overcome obstacles.
If you are trying to give up chocolate (I would never try this!), what are you going to do when you get a craving for chocolate, or when all your friends are chowing down on chocolate cake? Maybe your plan would be to carry a sweet substitute with you at all times. Or perhaps you could involve yourself in a fun activity when the urge strikes. If your obstacles are tougher and you need more support, consider hiring a life coach to help you work through your blocks.
9. Enlist the support of an accountability partner.
As you work towards your goals, it can be very helpful to have someone in your life to be your support partner. Consider asking your partner or friend to help you stick to the goals you have set. Use this person when you are struggling and set up a plan to check in regularly with him/her. As a coach, I have the privilege of trading coaching services with my peers. My coach helps me achieve my goals, overcome any obstacles, and celebrate my success.
10. Celebrate success along the way.
One of the most important things you can do for yourself is celebrate your small successes as you work towards your larger goals. Dont wait until the end to reward yourself. You deserve to be recognized for your efforts and your commitment, especially when your goals take a long time to achieve. If you dont celebrate on your journey, you will lose your motivation. So celebrate, celebrate, and celebrate!
Achieving your goals can be tough work sometimes, but it is also very rewarding. If you fall off your path, remember you can always get back on. Its okay to take a few detours. Its also okay to take a break to rest. Dont beat yourself up or give up hope. Start again where you fell down and before you know it, you will be a pro at accomplishing your goals.
Stop Scoring Own Goals > > >
BONUS : Title:
Stop Scoring Own Goals
Word Count:
1550
Summary:
Own goals are actions, things we do, that stop us from reaching where we want to go or what we want to obtain. When we are out of focus, when we are out of tune with whats going on.
Keywords:
goal setting
Article Body:
Own goals are actions, things we do, that stop us from reaching where we want to go or what we want to obtain. When we are out of focus, when we are out of tune with whats going on, when we do something which takes us in the opposite direction of where we were going or should be going, we have scored an own goal. Sometimes they happen accidentally, sometimes on purpose and sometimes simply because we try too hard.
First Own Goal
To stop scoring the first own goal, answer the following questions:
What is my focus?
What do I want out of life?
When you have a clear focus then you become more aware of your capabilities and what you need to add to be successful. However, we usually do it the other way around. We work out what our capabilities are and then decide what we should focus on. We live our lives like a flea in a flea circus.
How do you train fleas? Its easy; first you collect them and put them in a match box. Then you close the box. They keep jumping, hitting all sides of the box, until they get a headache, and all of a sudden, the noise stops. You then open the box and the fleas will only jump to the height of the original match box.
How many of us are like this?
We have learned to jump only to the height of the box we have been kept in and sometimes at the direction of the trainer. The result is, even when you take us out of our boxes, we dont jump to our true potential.
To have a chance of reaching your true potential your focus must come from your feelings.
What would you really like to achieve in your life?
What is that hidden dream?
What is that thought that you are frightened to acknowledge?
IF YOU HAVE THE FOCUS THEN YOU WILL PICK UP THE CAPABILITIES ON THE WAY.
First identify your Focus
Our guess is that this is the way you have run the most successful parts of your life to date. You already have the experience.
If you know where you are going, then start looking at where the own goals are occurring. Are you scoring own goals because the enthusiasm is gone? If you have the right focus your enthusiasm is naturally high. Therefore if you dont have the enthusiasm for your focus you dont have the correct focus. Once you have identified it, it is important to keep your aim and objective in front of you. Let it drive all your thoughts and behaviours otherwise you will get lost on the way.
REMEMBER:
Your capabilities and skills will develop as you pursue the focus.
Your enthusiasm is affected by your focus.
Second Own Goal
Another common way we stop ourselves from achieving is; we work out of the want box rather than the need box. It is important to differentiate WHAT YOU NEED FROM WHAT YOU WANT. If you pursue your needs rather than your wants then you have more chance of living a happier life and reaching your focus.
If you live in the want box (e.g. if only I had this, I would be happy) then you start putting conditions to your focus- the most common own goal we score.
Third Own Goal
What type of relationship do you have with:
yourself
other people.
How you treat yourself?
How do you treat other people?
The best relationship can have is a Win/ Win, a relationship where I win and you do too. We both feel we have achieved what was possible. The result is acceptable to both sides. Neither person feels hurt, used or abused by the encounter. In a Win /Win relationship, I feel good about myself and I feel good about my focus; what Im trying to achieve. When I do make mistakes I dont immediately become abusive to myself , I just stop to think and examine whats happened
Or, perhaps your style is a Win/Lose style, where you win and the other person loses. A style typically used by aggressive sales persons and business people. They have little or no interest in the other person provided they buy the product or do as they are told. Another way of playing a Win/Lose game is by committing what is now called a professional foul. If you cant win you do something to stop the other person winning.
Ask yourself: How many professional fouls have I committed this month? It can be something as easy as pouting or sulking.
When you go into a relationship, do you go into it to Win/ Win or Win /Lose?
If your self esteem is low you may find that your encounters and relationships are built on a Lose/Win scenario. In these relationships one person gives in all the time to enable the other person to Win. It may be masked in the phrase, I dont want to cause any trouble or I dont mind what happens, you make the decision. How many times do you make people feel sorry for you? Classic I Lose you Win behaviour. You give away all your power all the time and I wonder why you dont achieve anything and feel unhappy all the time.
In our experience the most destructive relationship is one based on Lose/Lose. On these occasions a person enters the relationship or conversation with the mindset that if I cant win no one is going to. This behaviour is very destructive.
When playing football or any other team sport do you see yourself as participating in a competition of winning and losing? Or do you see it as I am a player in a team with a role to play and my job is to achieve my personal best in this situation? After a major race or game the question a professional sportspersons asks themselves or their coach is, Did I perform to or beat my personal best this time?
The most important question to ask is:
Did I perform my personal best on this occasion?
Winning is not the issue. What matters is did I perform or exceed my personal best?
The Own Goal is scored when we dont know what our personal best is. We have no measure on our performance and so we tend to take decisions in life that take us away from Win/Win relationships.
Win/ Win for us is living in my personal best, the result is I play better, the team plays better and the best team on the day wins.
Forth Own Goal
"If you understood the power of your thoughts you would be frightened to think" a wisdom keeper once told me.
In other words your power is in your thoughts. Your thoughts drive your actions. So, get your thoughts right and correct actions must follow. In the context of this article, the correct thoughts are about you. How do you see yourself? How do you see others?
One way of changing the way you think is to treat your brain and thinking process in the same way gardeners treat their gardens, In other words do some Gardening of the Brain"
If you are a gardener the first thing you do is take stock of the garden. Identify the flowers, cultivated shrubs etc and the weeds. If you are new to gardening the first job is to identify which are the flowers and which are the weeds.
Now do the same with your thoughts:
Which of your thoughts would you classify as Weeds?
What behaviours would you classify as the weeds in your life?
If you are a Gardener you would now dig out and remove the weeds and replace them with your favourite flowers.
Which of your thoughts are your favourite flowers?
Which behaviours would you transplant as your favourite flowers?
The system to stop scoring the own goal is to Recognise, Remove and Replace all negative and unhelpful thoughts.
Recognise, Remove and Replace all thoughts that stop you achieving your focus.
Conclusion
Most of the things we do are HABITS.
I have a focus which is built on capabilities rather than capabilities are found to help me achieve my focus.
I run my life on what I think I want rather that what I need.
I build relationships on competing with others or giving in to others rather than trying to beat my personal best.
I spend time admiring and developing weeds in my garden rather than replacing them with flowers.
All you have to do is change them. In this article we have suggested that you will have a more productive and happier life if you change to your natural way. In other words instead of learning a new technique, just unlearn your present thought patterns and behaviour by doing what comes naturally. Focus on achieving your potential. Focus on what you really need in life. Focus on achieving your personal best at all times. Focus on being a flower rather than a weed.
Each time you catch yourself not thinking in this way, you will have scored another own goal.
Stop Scoring Own Goals
Word Count:
1550
Summary:
Own goals are actions, things we do, that stop us from reaching where we want to go or what we want to obtain. When we are out of focus, when we are out of tune with whats going on.
Keywords:
goal setting
Article Body:
Own goals are actions, things we do, that stop us from reaching where we want to go or what we want to obtain. When we are out of focus, when we are out of tune with whats going on, when we do something which takes us in the opposite direction of where we were going or should be going, we have scored an own goal. Sometimes they happen accidentally, sometimes on purpose and sometimes simply because we try too hard.
First Own Goal
To stop scoring the first own goal, answer the following questions:
What is my focus?
What do I want out of life?
When you have a clear focus then you become more aware of your capabilities and what you need to add to be successful. However, we usually do it the other way around. We work out what our capabilities are and then decide what we should focus on. We live our lives like a flea in a flea circus.
How do you train fleas? Its easy; first you collect them and put them in a match box. Then you close the box. They keep jumping, hitting all sides of the box, until they get a headache, and all of a sudden, the noise stops. You then open the box and the fleas will only jump to the height of the original match box.
How many of us are like this?
We have learned to jump only to the height of the box we have been kept in and sometimes at the direction of the trainer. The result is, even when you take us out of our boxes, we dont jump to our true potential.
To have a chance of reaching your true potential your focus must come from your feelings.
What would you really like to achieve in your life?
What is that hidden dream?
What is that thought that you are frightened to acknowledge?
IF YOU HAVE THE FOCUS THEN YOU WILL PICK UP THE CAPABILITIES ON THE WAY.
First identify your Focus
Our guess is that this is the way you have run the most successful parts of your life to date. You already have the experience.
If you know where you are going, then start looking at where the own goals are occurring. Are you scoring own goals because the enthusiasm is gone? If you have the right focus your enthusiasm is naturally high. Therefore if you dont have the enthusiasm for your focus you dont have the correct focus. Once you have identified it, it is important to keep your aim and objective in front of you. Let it drive all your thoughts and behaviours otherwise you will get lost on the way.
REMEMBER:
Your capabilities and skills will develop as you pursue the focus.
Your enthusiasm is affected by your focus.
Second Own Goal
Another common way we stop ourselves from achieving is; we work out of the want box rather than the need box. It is important to differentiate WHAT YOU NEED FROM WHAT YOU WANT. If you pursue your needs rather than your wants then you have more chance of living a happier life and reaching your focus.
If you live in the want box (e.g. if only I had this, I would be happy) then you start putting conditions to your focus- the most common own goal we score.
Third Own Goal
What type of relationship do you have with:
yourself
other people.
How you treat yourself?
How do you treat other people?
The best relationship can have is a Win/ Win, a relationship where I win and you do too. We both feel we have achieved what was possible. The result is acceptable to both sides. Neither person feels hurt, used or abused by the encounter. In a Win /Win relationship, I feel good about myself and I feel good about my focus; what Im trying to achieve. When I do make mistakes I dont immediately become abusive to myself , I just stop to think and examine whats happened
Or, perhaps your style is a Win/Lose style, where you win and the other person loses. A style typically used by aggressive sales persons and business people. They have little or no interest in the other person provided they buy the product or do as they are told. Another way of playing a Win/Lose game is by committing what is now called a professional foul. If you cant win you do something to stop the other person winning.
Ask yourself: How many professional fouls have I committed this month? It can be something as easy as pouting or sulking.
When you go into a relationship, do you go into it to Win/ Win or Win /Lose?
If your self esteem is low you may find that your encounters and relationships are built on a Lose/Win scenario. In these relationships one person gives in all the time to enable the other person to Win. It may be masked in the phrase, I dont want to cause any trouble or I dont mind what happens, you make the decision. How many times do you make people feel sorry for you? Classic I Lose you Win behaviour. You give away all your power all the time and I wonder why you dont achieve anything and feel unhappy all the time.
In our experience the most destructive relationship is one based on Lose/Lose. On these occasions a person enters the relationship or conversation with the mindset that if I cant win no one is going to. This behaviour is very destructive.
When playing football or any other team sport do you see yourself as participating in a competition of winning and losing? Or do you see it as I am a player in a team with a role to play and my job is to achieve my personal best in this situation? After a major race or game the question a professional sportspersons asks themselves or their coach is, Did I perform to or beat my personal best this time?
The most important question to ask is:
Did I perform my personal best on this occasion?
Winning is not the issue. What matters is did I perform or exceed my personal best?
The Own Goal is scored when we dont know what our personal best is. We have no measure on our performance and so we tend to take decisions in life that take us away from Win/Win relationships.
Win/ Win for us is living in my personal best, the result is I play better, the team plays better and the best team on the day wins.
Forth Own Goal
"If you understood the power of your thoughts you would be frightened to think" a wisdom keeper once told me.
In other words your power is in your thoughts. Your thoughts drive your actions. So, get your thoughts right and correct actions must follow. In the context of this article, the correct thoughts are about you. How do you see yourself? How do you see others?
One way of changing the way you think is to treat your brain and thinking process in the same way gardeners treat their gardens, In other words do some Gardening of the Brain"
If you are a gardener the first thing you do is take stock of the garden. Identify the flowers, cultivated shrubs etc and the weeds. If you are new to gardening the first job is to identify which are the flowers and which are the weeds.
Now do the same with your thoughts:
Which of your thoughts would you classify as Weeds?
What behaviours would you classify as the weeds in your life?
If you are a Gardener you would now dig out and remove the weeds and replace them with your favourite flowers.
Which of your thoughts are your favourite flowers?
Which behaviours would you transplant as your favourite flowers?
The system to stop scoring the own goal is to Recognise, Remove and Replace all negative and unhelpful thoughts.
Recognise, Remove and Replace all thoughts that stop you achieving your focus.
Conclusion
Most of the things we do are HABITS.
I have a focus which is built on capabilities rather than capabilities are found to help me achieve my focus.
I run my life on what I think I want rather that what I need.
I build relationships on competing with others or giving in to others rather than trying to beat my personal best.
I spend time admiring and developing weeds in my garden rather than replacing them with flowers.
All you have to do is change them. In this article we have suggested that you will have a more productive and happier life if you change to your natural way. In other words instead of learning a new technique, just unlearn your present thought patterns and behaviour by doing what comes naturally. Focus on achieving your potential. Focus on what you really need in life. Focus on achieving your personal best at all times. Focus on being a flower rather than a weed.
Each time you catch yourself not thinking in this way, you will have scored another own goal.
