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Secrets Of Happy And Long Lasting Marriage Sound Difficult Not S
Do you still remember the moment you together with your husband or wife swear in front of the altar that you will be keeping your marriage vows in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, and until death do your part? Good for the two of you if you still keep that scared vows you have made when you were married. Unfortunately, there are couples who happen to be filing divorces for different grounds.
Why there are couples who are making separate ways after they have taken that marriage vows? There are many reasons to mention, but the gravest of all is the loss of love and trust to one another. All the problems are rooted from this reason. How will you trust your partner if you do not love him/her? How will you love your partner if you do not trust him/her? These two questions will lead you to a very serious one, ÂHow will I make our marriage happy and long-lasting?Â
That is not a new question for every couple. Before marriage, they are exactly asking the same question. But this time, it is really serious. Remember that you have sworn before God that you will love and take care of each other until death, or even after death.
As mentioned earlier, the gravest reason of divorcing couples is the lack of love and trust. So what will you do to maintain or in case lost, return it in your relationship?
First thing to do is to have an open communication. One of the reasons of lack of trust is miscommunication. For instance, there will be an instance where you will not be revealing your problem to your partner even though he or she already noticed it. First thing that will come to his or her mind is that you do not trust her anymore because you are not revealing your problem.
Find ways of opening your communication. Have a talk every night before you sleep. You can confer to your partner experiences of the previous day. Let your partner know that you want him or her to be a part of everything you are experiencing with, most especially on cases when you have problems.
Another is to make sacrifices on some circumstances. It is one of the secrets to have a happy and long-lasting marriage. Both of you should be prepared to put your partnerÂs happiness ahead of your own from time to time.
There are instances that small problems become large problems if you will be showing that you are the boss of the relationship. You must learn to give way, after all a happy marriage is allowing your partner to be satisfied with your relationship. For instance, you can volunteer yourself on washing the dishes after dinner. Just see the smile on the face of your wife if you will do such small things for them. In addition, it also shows that you care for your partner.
Always be careful with your finances. If you do not handle your financial situation carefully, it can destroy your marriage. When financial crisis arise, it is important that the two of you should discuss the problem so that you are both aware of the situation you are facing and at the same time finding solutions. Working together on this particular issue will make each other feel that each of you is an integral part of the decision making process.
There are so many variables that affect your marriage. Just remember that love and trust will bind you together. Make each other realize that the two of you must continuously work on all of these aspects to ensure that your marriage will be happy and long-lasting through the rest of your lives.
BONUS : Seek Marriage Help From The Right Sources
If you need marriage help, donÂt make the mistake most people do. DonÂt talk to a member of the opposite sex about it unless that person is functioning in a professional capacity.
For example, a woman believes her husband doesnÂt give her as much attention as he should. She should never talk to a male coworker about the situation even if he is considered to be a dear friend. If he is sympathetic to her and they grow closer, more marriage problems are sure to follow. Depending on the workplace, conversation about the womanÂs situation might even be misconstrued as sexual harassment which is never appropriate in the work place.
The best person to discuss marriage help with is your spouse. If that just is not possible  either because your spouse is not willing or because there is a chance you might be harmed for trying to talk about your problems and concerns  talk with a trained professional. Visit a counselor or minister to talk about your marriage problems. They are trained to look at situations objectively and know how to maintain your confidentiality.
If you do not have a minister or know a counselor, you can find one discreetly by looking at your local phone book. Search under Âcounseling or Âmarriage counselors to find several to call. Some communities may even have counseling services free of charge for some situations. If you have a close friend you can confide in, ask if they have heard anything about the counselors you find. At work you can always pull that Âa friend of mine is looking for a counselor. Have you heard of any? trick.
If the advice you receive from the minister or counselor does not strike a chord with you, go somewhere else. That does not mean that if the advice is not what you want to hear, to leave it behind, however. When you seek help for your marriage, you need to be open minded enough to accept that some of the responsibility or blame may be your own.
Remember, the first step to solving any marriage problem is to seek help. If you and your spouse both agree, try going to a counselor together. The professional may prefer to see you individually after an initial meeting with the two of you together. If you are both willing to find marriage help, you will need to be accommodating and adaptable as you work through your problems and the counseling process.
If you need marriage help, donÂt make the mistake most people do. DonÂt talk to a member of the opposite sex about it unless that person is functioning in a professional capacity.
For example, a woman believes her husband doesnÂt give her as much attention as he should. She should never talk to a male coworker about the situation even if he is considered to be a dear friend. If he is sympathetic to her and they grow closer, more marriage problems are sure to follow. Depending on the workplace, conversation about the womanÂs situation might even be misconstrued as sexual harassment which is never appropriate in the work place.
The best person to discuss marriage help with is your spouse. If that just is not possible  either because your spouse is not willing or because there is a chance you might be harmed for trying to talk about your problems and concerns  talk with a trained professional. Visit a counselor or minister to talk about your marriage problems. They are trained to look at situations objectively and know how to maintain your confidentiality.
If you do not have a minister or know a counselor, you can find one discreetly by looking at your local phone book. Search under Âcounseling or Âmarriage counselors to find several to call. Some communities may even have counseling services free of charge for some situations. If you have a close friend you can confide in, ask if they have heard anything about the counselors you find. At work you can always pull that Âa friend of mine is looking for a counselor. Have you heard of any? trick.
If the advice you receive from the minister or counselor does not strike a chord with you, go somewhere else. That does not mean that if the advice is not what you want to hear, to leave it behind, however. When you seek help for your marriage, you need to be open minded enough to accept that some of the responsibility or blame may be your own.
Remember, the first step to solving any marriage problem is to seek help. If you and your spouse both agree, try going to a counselor together. The professional may prefer to see you individually after an initial meeting with the two of you together. If you are both willing to find marriage help, you will need to be accommodating and adaptable as you work through your problems and the counseling process.
