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Angered By An Affair
Ask the Marriage Maven: Angered by an Affair
Q. About a year ago, my husband had an affair with someone we both knew. It happened while I was pregnant. He said it would never happen again, but IÂ’m not so sure. SheÂ’s still in and out of our social circles.
I want to try to work things out, but every time I think about it, it makes me sick. The sad thing is that weÂ’ve been married less than three years. Maybe he wasnÂ’t ready to be married. How do we work through our problems and have a happy marriage? Right now, it seems impossible.
P. R.
A. First off, let me say that IÂ’m sorry that this happened to you. ItÂ’s hard to overcome the powerful feelings that linger after an affair. But if you think itÂ’s impossible to have a happy relationship now, thatÂ’s exactly what it will be. However, if you throw away the attitude of the impossible and embrace the one of determination, having a happy marriage can happen.
You might be right. It is possible (maybe probable) that your husband did not fully understand what your marriage would entail before getting into it, but now you both have a responsibility, and that includes raising your child.
It seems like youÂ’re making some good moves. Seeking help from books and the internet is a great idea. However, I would suggest that if you are not seeking professional counseling or coaching now--do it! Go with someone you trust to get you thought this difficult time. Even if youÂ’re the only one doing it at first, itÂ’s good to get started with a person who can give and objective approach and help you resolve some issues.
Ultimately, you and your husband will need to determine if renewing your commitment can work. Each of you will have to make a choice to consciously work at making your relationship better. Both of you will need to make your marriage a priority—even above taking care of your child(ren).
Despite what many people think, love is not a feeling, it’s a decision. I once heard a saying: “Marriage is like a pet snake, you better feed it every day or bad things will happen.” If your husband is willing to change, positive action towards making your marriage better will be evident. That said keep your eyes and heart open.
BONUS : Anniversary Gift For Wedding Anniversary Or Just An Anniversary Celebration
The wedding bells hardly stop ringing and it is time to unfreeze the cake and celebrate the first anniversary. It seems like only yesterday that they were married. “Honey could you buy an anniversary gift for them?” This question is mulled over many times with every family. The anniversary date slipped up on them without them remembering to buy a gift! Friends, parents and relatives all have wedding anniversaries that pop up and the hassle of getting a gift for the occasion is inconvenient.
The gift shop and wedding gift selections are now available in your home. Instead of hours trudging the malls, fighting traffic and shopkeeperÂ’s attitudes, relax and let your fingers be your guide. Cyberspace shopping will increase by 40 billion this year alone as secure shopping gives you the same peace of mind as if you had used your credit card in person at the mall.
Online shopping allows you a greater selection for the gift-giving occasion. If you are looking to buy a wedding anniversary gift, including the 25th anniversary or just an anniversary celebrating a milestone in your life, you will be pleased to find the endless variety of shops available to you on the Internet.
Be creative, buy unique, something special, what would they like? These are the plagues of shopping for a wedding anniversary gift. After all didn’t we exhaust those options when we bought the wedding gift? Now the couple has given you time to observe a trend of preferences such as gourmet cooking, crystal collecting, home décor, or healthy diets. These tips concerning their new life together can be the clues that help you select a perfect gift to make that 25th anniversary special or any anniversary a fond memory.
If you find that the special date fast approaching and an anniversary gift is needed most online wedding anniversary gift shops can deliver the gift to your door or the recipient's door within 3 days for a regular postage fee or overnight if you really forgot the anniversary.
Nothing is more exciting than to have the mailman deliver a package to an unsuspecting couple. There is jubilation when FedEx or UPS comes knocking at your door with a gift set surprise, a culinary delight or just the perfect table presents to set the dining ambience for the coupleÂ’s impending pleasure.
Look for a website that includes a telephone number and a money back guarantee. Wedding anniversary gift giving doesnÂ’t have to be drudgery; you will find the ease of shopping online so convenient that you will start every gift-giving occasion with a spin on the Internet. You are now free to join the celebration. Happy anniversary!
The wedding bells hardly stop ringing and it is time to unfreeze the cake and celebrate the first anniversary. It seems like only yesterday that they were married. “Honey could you buy an anniversary gift for them?” This question is mulled over many times with every family. The anniversary date slipped up on them without them remembering to buy a gift! Friends, parents and relatives all have wedding anniversaries that pop up and the hassle of getting a gift for the occasion is inconvenient.
The gift shop and wedding gift selections are now available in your home. Instead of hours trudging the malls, fighting traffic and shopkeeperÂ’s attitudes, relax and let your fingers be your guide. Cyberspace shopping will increase by 40 billion this year alone as secure shopping gives you the same peace of mind as if you had used your credit card in person at the mall.
Online shopping allows you a greater selection for the gift-giving occasion. If you are looking to buy a wedding anniversary gift, including the 25th anniversary or just an anniversary celebrating a milestone in your life, you will be pleased to find the endless variety of shops available to you on the Internet.
Be creative, buy unique, something special, what would they like? These are the plagues of shopping for a wedding anniversary gift. After all didn’t we exhaust those options when we bought the wedding gift? Now the couple has given you time to observe a trend of preferences such as gourmet cooking, crystal collecting, home décor, or healthy diets. These tips concerning their new life together can be the clues that help you select a perfect gift to make that 25th anniversary special or any anniversary a fond memory.
If you find that the special date fast approaching and an anniversary gift is needed most online wedding anniversary gift shops can deliver the gift to your door or the recipient's door within 3 days for a regular postage fee or overnight if you really forgot the anniversary.
Nothing is more exciting than to have the mailman deliver a package to an unsuspecting couple. There is jubilation when FedEx or UPS comes knocking at your door with a gift set surprise, a culinary delight or just the perfect table presents to set the dining ambience for the coupleÂ’s impending pleasure.
Look for a website that includes a telephone number and a money back guarantee. Wedding anniversary gift giving doesnÂ’t have to be drudgery; you will find the ease of shopping online so convenient that you will start every gift-giving occasion with a spin on the Internet. You are now free to join the celebration. Happy anniversary!
