Marriage Counseling

Marriage Counseling

Currently, the western world has a divorce rate of close to 50%. Some countries have an even higher rate. So why are we seeing an increase in divorce and how can marriage counseling help save marriage – yours and other peoples?

I think it's fair to say that the easier you make something the more often it will occur. If it becomes more frequent it loses its taboo and therefore becomes far more acceptable in society’s eyes.

My wife is from a divorced family. When she was a kid at school she was in the minority and it was a stigma. Now, my children are in the minority of those whose parents are still together. Of course, one of the major impacts of divorce is on the family. The impact on young children is often underestimated and we should recognize that even though one in two marriages may end – no matter how common, it doesn’t reduce the impact on the family.

Marriage counseling is form of therapy and conflict resolution. It is normally carried out by trained psychotherapist (though not always). For it to work properly both parties need to attend, though separate sessions will most likely be helpful.

If you are considering seeing a marriage counselor then here a few points to consider and questions to ask to help save marriage.

1. Is a first assessment session free?
2. How many times a week are needed?
3. Do you need to pay after each session?
4. Is the marriage counselor qualified?
5. Is the marriage counselor recommended by someone you trust?
6. How long will each session be?
7. Are you able to contact the marriage Counselor outside of session times?
8. Will the sessions fit in with your work schedule?

I am all for marriage counseling to save marriage, however, very often people are being paid huge sums to point out the blindingly obvious. In fact a lot of issues are screaming out to be noticed and normally have been by friends and family.

Of course, having an independent ear can be very useful - but you can achieve a huge amount yourself. With the right techniques, you can actually conduct your own marriage counseling.

(c) Copyright 2005 Steve Holloway

BONUS : Marriage - How To Avoid Work Stress Hurt Your Marriage?

Work stress plays a very major role in hurting married life. Most of the men and women bring their stress home and play havoc with their married life. The stress spills over at home and creates further stress. Home should be used to dissolve the work stress. Home should be the place to relax and get comfort. Home should be the place where we get rid of the stress that we bring from outside. But opposite happens. Let us discuss how to avoid this and keep our home protected from any such stresses. Let us also discuss how home can help us fight these stresses.

The very first question should be - What is more important? Married life or work life? New work /job can be found, but getting another person to marry will be difficult. What about after retirement? Who will be with us- our spouse or our company? We never think about these issues. For us the stress at that moment is the center of our life. Our mind is occupied with that stress. Therefore when we reach home, we are ready to speak harshly, blame family members, showing irritation and express our frustration in many other ways.

Ideally, when we reach home, we should tell our spouse about the stress and ask help to get over it. He/she will find ways to comfort us. Prepare a comforting hot bath, putting on light music or your favorite television show. We should make our family a partner in our stress and not blame them for contributing to our work woes, because that is generally not the truth. A marriage can be a great cure for stressed life. It is not the place where you go and put all your blames. Bringing balance in life is most important. Make your marriage work for you. Don’t let your work damage your marriage.