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Marriage Counseling When To Save Your Relationship

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Marriage Counseling: When To Save Your Relationship?

Happiness and fulfillment are two great components of a successful marriage. The absence of which, along with other things, may eventually cause marital disasters.

The most basic principle that marriage counseling teaches is to save an existing relationship from total destruction and to lead both of the couple back to the path of marital bliss. Though marriage counseling may work for some, the truth remains to be the truth- there are marriages that may never be saved.

For both conditions, there are corresponding reasons and factors. Many of these will be discussed in the succeeding paragraphs. But the bottom line for both factors is that the willingness of both parties to restore the broken relationship is actually the ultimate driving factor.

There are several reasons why couples seek marriage counseling. This is but natural, for there are endless possibilities why how people create conflicts in their marriages. Though it is widely accepted that all marriages are bombarded with difficulties some time in their lives, it is sad to note that many don't seem to override them. And most drop into the pitfall of divorce.

The most natural conditions by which marriage counseling is often sought are when couples feel frustration, extreme sadness and severe hurt. These are frequently not new between the couples and had been growing around for years. Unfortunately, the only time that people enter marriage counseling is when the relationship is already on the edge of breaking down. This is reason enough why young couples or those that are yet starting to sense fraction in their relationship have the greater chance of fixing the marriage.

It is not wrong to aspire for happiness. But it is not often that way. To get rid of further troubles, it is wise to accept this reality and to work towards achieving happiness on a more sensible and realistic approach. Marriage demands hard work. It obliges the couple to commit themselves to the consequences of their relationship. They often need to suspend their egos and to drop down the claim for who is right to get around the issues that may send them shouting over dinners. Agreeing to drop the "who is right" thing is a crucial part of both the marriage and marriage counseling. Without this, everything may all be in vain.

It may have been observed that throughout this article, saving the marriage is only the central discussion. But how about for those couples who insist for divorce? Marriage counseling may also answer for that. However, it may be a much longer process, especially when children are at stake. If the marital relationship may not be saved, then the best solution to this is for the couples to transform into friends or willing co-parents towards the growth of their children. This way, pain may be lessened while contributing to a much constructive process.

During the stage of dissolution, extreme pain and other mixes of emotions may be felt. This state may be further aggravated by the obvious emotional and physical separation. For the majority of cases, this state may come to the level of mourning and distress. Marriage counseling may be of best help during this condition as it may help to bring out unexpressed emotions between the couples.

Once the signs of marriage destruction have made themselves transparent for the couples, it is best to seek marriage counseling in the earliest possible time. Or you might be too late to save the relationship.
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BONUS : Marriage Counseling

Currently, the western world has a divorce rate of close to 50%. Some countries have an even higher rate. So why are we seeing an increase in divorce and how can marriage counseling help save marriage – yours and other peoples?

I think it's fair to say that the easier you make something the more often it will occur. If it becomes more frequent it loses its taboo and therefore becomes far more acceptable in society’s eyes.

My wife is from a divorced family. When she was a kid at school she was in the minority and it was a stigma. Now, my children are in the minority of those whose parents are still together. Of course, one of the major impacts of divorce is on the family. The impact on young children is often underestimated and we should recognize that even though one in two marriages may end – no matter how common, it doesn’t reduce the impact on the family.

Marriage counseling is form of therapy and conflict resolution. It is normally carried out by trained psychotherapist (though not always). For it to work properly both parties need to attend, though separate sessions will most likely be helpful.

If you are considering seeing a marriage counselor then here a few points to consider and questions to ask to help save marriage.

1. Is a first assessment session free?
2. How many times a week are needed?
3. Do you need to pay after each session?
4. Is the marriage counselor qualified?
5. Is the marriage counselor recommended by someone you trust?
6. How long will each session be?
7. Are you able to contact the marriage Counselor outside of session times?
8. Will the sessions fit in with your work schedule?

I am all for marriage counseling to save marriage, however, very often people are being paid huge sums to point out the blindingly obvious. In fact a lot of issues are screaming out to be noticed and normally have been by friends and family.

Of course, having an independent ear can be very useful - but you can achieve a huge amount yourself. With the right techniques, you can actually conduct your own marriage counseling.

(c) Copyright 2005 Steve Holloway
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"Sauver Son Couple en 60 Jours"
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