Si vous n'êtes pas à l'aise avec l'anglais, utilisez ceci :
Cet outil vous fournit une traduction automatisée en français.
How Could Everything Change So Dramatically
I came across this quote today and wanted to share it with you. You may find that it relates to your marriage.
The difficultly with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but we must live with a character.
- Peter Devries
We can only appreciate the profundity of this statement if we understand what is meant by CHARACTER.
Personality is easy to understand. Your personality is how people experience you. Its your public persona.
But what is character? And why is character so crucial in your marriage?
Character is who you are when no one is watching.
Let me say that again so you can read it slowly and really digest it this time.
Character is who you are when no one is watching.
You see, when you and your spouse met, you met each others PERSONALITIES. You showed your spouse and you were shown by your spouse your public personas. Im not saying you tricked each other. Its just your personality how you display yourself to others.
But marriage lasts too long in too close quarters for anyone to sustain a public persona. Personalities eventually give way to an INNER SELF that gets revealed for the first time. And there you each stand, naked as if no one is watching. But someone is watching. And thats when you meet for the first time again!
You and your spouse dont meet the person who charmed each others friends, bought gifts for each others parents, and always smiled from ear to ear. No, this time its a meeting of your CHARACTERS.
In many cases, its not only that youre meeting each other for the first time, but its that youre meeting YOURSELVES for the first time.
Most people wouldnt be caught dead treating anyone the way they treat their spouse. Most people dont recognize their own behavior. Im just not myself with him/her. Well then who is that person? Thats YOU its your character. (And your spouse meets their character.)
The reason so many people fail at marriage and an attempt at marriage renewal is NOT that they dont like their spouse. Its that they dont like THEMSELVES. And while everyone else in their life is like a mirror reflecting their personality; their spouse is a mirror reflecting their character. And most people dont like what they see.
Many people would rather choose to be with someone else than remain with their spouse and have to continue to be with themselves. (Did you get that?)
Balthasar Gracian wrote in his 17th century manual on success, The Art of Worldly Wisdom, as follows: You are as much a real person as you are deep. As with the depths of a diamond, the interior is twice as important as the surface. There are people who are all facade, like a house left unfinished when the funds run out. They have the entrance of a palace but the inner rooms of a cottage.
Marriage renewal and individual character development go hand-in-hand. If you want to improve one, work on the other too.
Would you like more counsel? Subscribe to my FREE marriage help email service. Over 75,000 each year subscribe to receive the free report "7 Secrets for Fixing Your Marriage." This advice alone will begin to change your marriage. And youll also get 5 free marriage assessments and more information about Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel. There are no strings attached. You can sign up for free by visiting www.MarriageMax.com.
BONUS : How Get A Marriage Certificate Asap...
Laws for marriage certificate vary from state to state. This means that you will depend on the state that you live in and follow by the rules. A person cannot just request for a marriage certificate without proper requirements. Laws have been required that marriage certificates are strictly handed out and you need to comply with all the requirements first.
Here are some of the requirements that you need to get a marriage certificate:A country clerk should release a marriage certificate. A clerk of the court can also release it but it requires a certain payment of a fee.Couples can be issued with a marriage certificate only if they are 18 years and older. If not, they need consent of their parents or a judge if they are younger.
Some states require proof of immunity or vaccination because many states have done away with the required mandatory exams and blood tests. Some of the states require test venereal diseases, and rubella, which is also known as German Measles. This disease is very dangerous to fetuses. In addition, they have conducted tests to check if they are free from sickle-cell anemia and tuberculosis.
A person applying for a marriage certificate should have a proof of termination of prior marriages by death or by judgment of dissolution, which is also known as annulment or divorce. If the person already had a valid marriage, he should terminate his marital status before he can obtain another. He can obtain it through divorce lawsuit or dissolution. This will result in a judgment, which will return both man and woman to the status of an unmarried person.
A person should have sufficient mental capacity. This is determined as the persons ability to enter into a contract. Marriage will require two consenting people. If one of them does not understand the purpose of getting married, then the person does not have the capacity to consent therefore, they will never be issued with a marriage certificate.
The couples should not be close blood relatives. However, in some states, first cousins can marry and it is legal. Although they allow it, a few requires that one of the cousins should not conceive children.
Due to the widespread of venereal diseases and AIDS and HIV, some states require that couples applying for marriage certificate needs to undergo an HIV test or they should be provided with enough information about AIDS..
A marriage certificate can be issued after the marriage ceremony is performed. This will also allow a satisfaction of a waiting period after the ceremony. This waiting period is the time for the couples to cool off before the date of marriage comes. The purpose of the waiting period is for them to make up their minds. Marriage ceremony should only be done until they have completely decided to get married and wish to stay with each other for the rest of their lives.
If not, at least they will have time to think if they are ready of not. Before getting married, it is important that both parties have completely come to a right decision because having a divorce is as difficult as getting married. Some divorce and annulment applications are not granted easily. Therefore, it does not make him or her available for another marriage contract with another partner.
Laws for marriage certificate vary from state to state. This means that you will depend on the state that you live in and follow by the rules. A person cannot just request for a marriage certificate without proper requirements. Laws have been required that marriage certificates are strictly handed out and you need to comply with all the requirements first.
Here are some of the requirements that you need to get a marriage certificate:A country clerk should release a marriage certificate. A clerk of the court can also release it but it requires a certain payment of a fee.Couples can be issued with a marriage certificate only if they are 18 years and older. If not, they need consent of their parents or a judge if they are younger.
Some states require proof of immunity or vaccination because many states have done away with the required mandatory exams and blood tests. Some of the states require test venereal diseases, and rubella, which is also known as German Measles. This disease is very dangerous to fetuses. In addition, they have conducted tests to check if they are free from sickle-cell anemia and tuberculosis.
A person applying for a marriage certificate should have a proof of termination of prior marriages by death or by judgment of dissolution, which is also known as annulment or divorce. If the person already had a valid marriage, he should terminate his marital status before he can obtain another. He can obtain it through divorce lawsuit or dissolution. This will result in a judgment, which will return both man and woman to the status of an unmarried person.
A person should have sufficient mental capacity. This is determined as the persons ability to enter into a contract. Marriage will require two consenting people. If one of them does not understand the purpose of getting married, then the person does not have the capacity to consent therefore, they will never be issued with a marriage certificate.
The couples should not be close blood relatives. However, in some states, first cousins can marry and it is legal. Although they allow it, a few requires that one of the cousins should not conceive children.
Due to the widespread of venereal diseases and AIDS and HIV, some states require that couples applying for marriage certificate needs to undergo an HIV test or they should be provided with enough information about AIDS..
A marriage certificate can be issued after the marriage ceremony is performed. This will also allow a satisfaction of a waiting period after the ceremony. This waiting period is the time for the couples to cool off before the date of marriage comes. The purpose of the waiting period is for them to make up their minds. Marriage ceremony should only be done until they have completely decided to get married and wish to stay with each other for the rest of their lives.
If not, at least they will have time to think if they are ready of not. Before getting married, it is important that both parties have completely come to a right decision because having a divorce is as difficult as getting married. Some divorce and annulment applications are not granted easily. Therefore, it does not make him or her available for another marriage contract with another partner.
