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My Child Steals

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My Child Steals

Parents need to know that it is very common and normal for children under the ages of four and five to take things that do not belong to them without understanding the concept of stealing. Children need to be taught lessons in personal property and not taking something without permission. Children under the age of five are generally self-centered and their primary focus is often seeing and taking what they want. That’s why parents need to begin teaching their child the manners involved in asking permission to take, borrow or use someone else's belongings. Parents who overlook these important lessons often receive embarrassing phone calls from their child's school, youth programs or neighbors in regards to their child's theft issues.

Why Do Children Steal?

There are many reasons why children may take things that do not belong to them. Parents need to become more concerned when they see a repeated pattern of stealing and are beginning to identify their child with more then one of the reasons for stealing listed below.

· A child may be stealing to get attention. The attention that they may be seeking, other than the parents, may include their peers or brothers and sisters.

· Children often learn from adults. When a child sees a parent take items from their work, neighbors or even stores in front of their children, are modeling the behavior of stealing. Children often learn from this example that some stealing is acceptable behavior.

· A child may feel that they "found" an item that does not belong to them, and therefore they may keep the item. Parents need to teach their children that a "found" item is not necessarily theirs to keep.

· A child's basic needs may not be met. Some children who steal often feel they are lacking something that other children may have. For example: Some of your child's friends may have pocket money to buy extra food while they are at school. The parent may not view this desire as necessary or the parent cannot afford the "pocket change" to give to their child, so the child steals the money to meet his or her needs.

· Some children steal to gain control or power.

· Some children steal for the thrill. This often occurs with older teens and adults. This type of stealing often becomes habitual.

· Some children steal to fit in or to be accepted by their peers. This type of stealing is often caused by peer pressure.

What Can Parents Do?

Parents who do nothing to react to their child stealing are only condoning the behavior. Parents need to take steps immediately when they catch their child taking something that does not belong to him or her. Below are some parenting solutions that can be implemented for children who exhibit stealing behaviors.

· Parents always need to be aware of where their children are and what they are doing.

· Sit down and talk with your child about stealing. The conversation should include what is and what is not stealing. This conversation may take place, depending on your child's reasoning abilities, between the ages of four and five. Tell your child that stealing is wrong.

· Have your child agree that he or she will not touch some ones property without their permission.

· Make sure that your child knows that there will be natural consequences for stealing. Examples of natural consequences include loss of friends, loss of trust and not having a good feeling about stealing.

· Let your child know that there will be negative consequences from you. Your child should either return the item to the owner or pay for the item. If the child does not have money, he or she should do some extra tasks to earn the money. Hold your child accountable for the inappropriate action.

· If your child is stealing items from other kids at school and the items include things that he or she needs (pencils, paper and crayons), tell your child not to take another students belonging, you will buy what is needed.

· Avoid lecturing or labeling your child as a thief. Once your child realizes and agrees that the behavior was wrong the child should be given a chance to start over.

· Put all items that you do not want your child to have in an area that he or she cannot get to them.

· Teach your child that he or she will have a chance to earn the item in the near future. This will teach your child patience and delayed gratification.

· Teenagers who steal often do so for the thrill of the experience. Get your child involved in other activities that will fill their need for excitement.

· Children, especially teenagers who have habitual stealing behaviors, arrest for shoplifting or other reports of theft should see a trained professional (doctor, psychiatrist, psychologist etc.) who specializes in the area of stealing for more necessary interventions.
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BONUS : My Kids Have The Same Toys As Everyone Else, How Do I Find Unique Toys?

Have you found yourself running out to the mall and buying toy after toy for you kids simply because they have friends who have this toy, only to find the toy isn't even played with a couple of weeks after being purchased? The cycle then resurfaces for the next toy of the moment your child tells you he or she wants. Playing with toys can not only be fun, but with the right toys play time can also stimulate your child's imagination and creativity. Although malls have many toy stores and department stores, these stores tend to all carry the same set of toys and products. They follow the tried and true formula for carrying products, allowing for little to no unique products.

Children tend to want the same toys as their friends simply because whoever is first to get it will be the proud owner of a new unique toy. This novelty of having a unique toy soon wears off as each of your children's friends now has this same toy, all purchased from the same store in the mall. A child's creativity needs the right creative toys to continue growing.

As a parent you walk a fine line between spoiling a child and rewarding them with new toys. But from experience you know that the euphoria from having a unique toy fades as the toy becomes mainstream. What are you to do so as to not fall in this cycle?

The answer is found on the Internet! Many toy stores have opened online selling unique, creative, imaginative, or simply hard to find toys products. Very few specialty stores will carry products that can be found at another store that specializes in carrying unique items.

The next time a toy purchase is planned, why not bring your child with you to the computer and show them all of the stuff they never would have known exists if you had gone to shop at your area mall. You never know what you could find.

Does your child like building blocks, such as Lego's™? Then why not try Clics, a building material that clicks together with endless opportunities for your little one. Blast off to the moon, or to completely new worlds with the Clics rocket, or ride the Orient Express with the Clics train set. And those are simply the special Clics sets. With buckets of Clics there is no limit as to what can be built. Creativity and imagination are able to run free while designing the next great structure.

Buying toys online also make it easy to find the perfect unique birthday or holiday gift for not only your own child, but for family and friends as well.
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