Mommy Baby Styles Of Parenting

Mommy & Baby: Styles Of Parenting

As a parent, you have the opportunity to set the tone in your home based on the style of parenting you choose. You can choose child-centered parenting or family-centered parenting—the differences will be discussed here.

 Child-centered Parenting
o Intensely pursue the child’s happiness, taking great strains to avoid discomfort or emotional stress for the child.
o The child receives what she wants when she wants it: no delay, no waiting.

These concepts might not sound too bad, but what happens when Mom is sick? Or when Mom & Dad want to leave the baby with a sitter? There is little-to-no freedom in this parenting plan—and the baby will not grow in to a child who understands delayed gratification or how the world works. Additionally, this sets a child up for a bad case of “me-ism”—other people will not matter to her. Her goals and needs are paramount to everyone else’s goals and needs, and the ability to look outward and understand being part of a team will be compromised.

 Family-centered Parenting
o Keeps the baby’s needs met, but within the appropriate context of the family unit.
o The child enters in to a team-setting; she is not the center of the universe, but part of the family-team.

These concepts might not seem very different from the child-centered approach to parenting, but the results of the two methods are starkly different. Parents have the freedom to meet their child’s needs and look ahead to developing skills and abilities, as they aren’t catering to every fleeting whim or fancy a child might express. Sitters are okay for the family, as the parents will take time out to “date” and be intentional with each other. Because a baby raised in a family-centered plan understands that she is part of a team, she will learn “we-ism,” not “me-ism.” She will consider others as she grows and how her goals and needs can be met within the framework of a team—without compromising the others on the team.

You may know people on either side of these parenting styles who go overboard. That’s not what I’m advocating here; a balance must be achieved. Remember these things:

 Life doesn’t stop because you have a baby
 Date your spouse
 Continue those loving gestures you enjoyed before your baby came along
 Invite some friends over for food and fellowship
 At the end of each day, spend 15 minutes sitting with your spouse, discussing the day’s events

BONUS : Mommy & Baby: Teething & Weaning

These are two topics that strike fear in the hearts of all parents: what will happen when my baby starts teething? How will he respond when it’s time to wean him (from the breast)?

Teething

Teething is not a disease, but a condition of growth. It shouldn’t be dreaded, but simply seen as an accomplishment of a healthy, growing child. Most babies begin teething between 6-8 months of age, but as in all children, it may vary wildly. Some babies are known to teethe as early as 2 months or as late as 14 months. Pediatric dentists agree that the longer it takes a baby to teethe, the stronger and healthier the teeth are. Additionally, the later the teeth take to arrive, the later they will fall out and be replaced by permanent teeth.

Teething should not affect nursing in any way, unless your baby begins chomping down on your nipple. While this is painful and one’s natural response would be to yelp, if you can stay calm and remove him from your breast while saying, “No, no!” you will have a much better response and less biting later on.

Some babies will experience fussiness, irritability, increased salivation, and a slightly raised temperature as they teethe. A proactive dose of infant Tylenol will help greatly, especially before bedtime.

Weaning

Weaning is defined by the process in which parents offer food supplements in place of or in addition to mother’s milk. This process begins the moment parents offer a bottle of formula or when their baby first tastes cereal. It is a gradual process.

When weaning from breastfeeding, it’s typically easier to drop the late-afternoon feeding first. Replace each feeding dropped with six to eight ounces of formula or milk, depending on the baby’s age.

Weaning from the bottle typically begins with your baby’s arrival at his first birthday. Again, it is a gradual process. Most moms wean straight to a sippy cup with great success. As you replace each bottle (one at a time, though) with a sippy full of milk, be patient. It will take time for your child to catch on to drinking from one of these cups, and you don’t want to unduly frustrate him in the process.