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I Used To Hate The Darkness
Like many children, when I was young I hated the darkness. I hated everything about it. I loved being outside during the bright sunshine of the day to play and discover new things with friends, but you couldn't get me to take a walk in the darkness of night to save my life. I loved playing with my toys and siblings in the basement, but you couldn't get me to be the first one to enter the darkness and turn on the lights. I simply hated the darkness. It scared me more than anything else
I think the biggest thing that bothered me about the darkness was the fact that it represented the unfamiliar and the unknown to me. In the sunlight of day I could see all around me. I could walk and run and explore while seeing all there was to see. Darkness has a way of hiding the potential dangers and scary things in life, and I for one didn't like it.
Does anyone else relate to my childhood plight? Do any other adults remember being afraid in darkness? After having four children of my own, I have learned that being afraid of darkness is quite common among children. They do not like the unknown of darkness and very literally, they do not like being hindered from seeing what is around them. Of course, as I have grown up, my fear of darkness has subsided drastically as I have learned that the same things I can see in the light are still there when it turns to darkness. I have realized that nothing extra is out to haunt me in darkness.
I have intentionally been trying to help my children overcome their fear of darkness. We have been taking short walks as a family as darkness begins to settle in at the end of the day. They are fine as long as we are talking and as long as they can grab a hand with someone else. There is something profoundly connected between the fear of darkness and the fear of being alone I have realized. So I am attempting to break their fear of darkness by reinforcing that they are not alone. Having my children share bedrooms with each other has also greatly helped them in the process of overcoming their fears of darkness. With two people in a room nothing is as scary and usually one will stand up and be strong in the face of fear.
I write all this to say simply that life is full of things to be afraid of. It is our choice, however, how we choose to let things like darkness or lonliness affect us. We can be overcome or we can learn to overcome our fears. I'd suggest that life is far too short to spend it in fear of darkness or any other thing.
BONUS : If You're A Parent Then Parent Well
One of my biggest frustrations in life is seeing parents who do not know how to parent. I believe strongly that being a parent is one of life's greatest privileges. However, with this great privilege, like all other privileges, comes great responsibility. One of our greatest contributions to our society and to the generations that come behind us happens in the way that we parent are children. What could be more important than learning how to parent and doing it well?
You've all been there and seen it. A bowling alley late at night. Beside your lane are parents that look like kids themselves. They are enjoying beer and way too many cigarettes. You would never guess they were parents unless you saw their young children wandering around them in between frames. You know without looking at your watch that it is way too late for children that young to still be awake let alone out in public. You can't help but wonder as their parents get drunk while ignoring them what kind of life the children lead and what kind of parents they truly are.
My desire to inform people about the realities of parenting began as a scene much like the one I just described happened as I bowled with friends one night. I went home to where my children were safely in bed after having been tucked into bed with their favorite story by their father and I just had to wonder what the lives of those neglected children would be like in twenty years compared to the lives of my own children twenty years down the road. I couldn't help but think of the great role that a parent plays in the growth and development of their children.
If you are a parent, then please, please learn how to be a good parent. Take classes, read books, or get counseling. Do whatever is necessary for you to become the kind of parent that your children so desperately need in order to grow up as healthy, smart and successful people. The future of your children and even their children depend on the kind of parent you will be. Realize that raising children is one of the best privileges you could have in life. Take that privilege seriously and give your children the time, attention, and love that they need. The day you become a parent is the day that life stops being all about you. So please, if you are a parent or ever plan to be one, act like it. The whole world will be glad you did.
One of my biggest frustrations in life is seeing parents who do not know how to parent. I believe strongly that being a parent is one of life's greatest privileges. However, with this great privilege, like all other privileges, comes great responsibility. One of our greatest contributions to our society and to the generations that come behind us happens in the way that we parent are children. What could be more important than learning how to parent and doing it well?
You've all been there and seen it. A bowling alley late at night. Beside your lane are parents that look like kids themselves. They are enjoying beer and way too many cigarettes. You would never guess they were parents unless you saw their young children wandering around them in between frames. You know without looking at your watch that it is way too late for children that young to still be awake let alone out in public. You can't help but wonder as their parents get drunk while ignoring them what kind of life the children lead and what kind of parents they truly are.
My desire to inform people about the realities of parenting began as a scene much like the one I just described happened as I bowled with friends one night. I went home to where my children were safely in bed after having been tucked into bed with their favorite story by their father and I just had to wonder what the lives of those neglected children would be like in twenty years compared to the lives of my own children twenty years down the road. I couldn't help but think of the great role that a parent plays in the growth and development of their children.
If you are a parent, then please, please learn how to be a good parent. Take classes, read books, or get counseling. Do whatever is necessary for you to become the kind of parent that your children so desperately need in order to grow up as healthy, smart and successful people. The future of your children and even their children depend on the kind of parent you will be. Realize that raising children is one of the best privileges you could have in life. Take that privilege seriously and give your children the time, attention, and love that they need. The day you become a parent is the day that life stops being all about you. So please, if you are a parent or ever plan to be one, act like it. The whole world will be glad you did.
