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Online Dating At The End Of The Rainbow
The journey to healthy online dating, intimate, social and personal relationships start at the beginning of the rainbow. Experiencing the joy of childbirth is analogous to viewing a beautiful rainbow. Many women love being pregnant! They feel sexy and sensual, busty and beautiful. Furthermore, every time they gaze upon their expanding bellies they must realize part two of this phenomenal and splendid act is about to commence.
Many loving and responsible parents verbalize the same statement, in anticipation of the birth of their newborn. ÂI want to give my son or daughter those things I never hadÂ, is a universal statement. The statement made by parentÂs echoes around the world. During the elation of the newborn, we fail to realize our traditional ways may have a negative impact on our newbornÂs disposition, as she/he develops.
Manipulated by tradition, we believe there is no other means to an end other than the way of those who went before us. Fraud, manipulation, and deception have led us to believe that it is appropriate behavior to expose our children to fairy tales. We also accepted the belief that fairy tales are morality tales that will strengthen the moral disposition of our children. This statement is far from the truth, as children around the world who are exposed to fairy tales grow-up trying to unravel the complexities in their lives caused by being trapped in the fairy tale syndrome.
Our Fantasies Begin to Dominate Our Minds;
Our Desires Dominate Reason;
We begin to See Life;
As We Desire Life to Be.
Fairy tales and fictional characters harbor illusions in our minds, constantly generating a false sense of reality. We begin to believe what we imagine to be real, loosing all perspective of reality. If we fail to focus on the moment (reality), we may experience severe agony in the future. We are always concentrating on imaginary future events as the present moment and its life giving lessons pass us by. We find our dating relationships crumbling to pieces and we do not know why. We wake-up in a state of dizziness; our dating relationships resemble the workings of a revolving door, everyone is jumping on and off and it seems like life is spinning out of control.
Our fantasies begin to dominate our minds; our desires dominate reason; we begin to see life, as we desire life to be. We begin to fantasize about the type of intimate relationships we are going to have even taking it to the extent of perceiving how we are going to act within the relationships. We create images in our minds, fantasizing about our knight in shining armor, or a Britney Spears look alike, or just the girl next door. We begin to fantasize about all sorts of things. It is similar to parachute jumping without a parachute. It is an enormous mistake because every action has a reaction. Not knowing what the next moment will bring, places us in an unprotected state.
When our fantasies fail to turn into reality, intoxicants seems to be an alternative. Our relationships with others turn sour and we turn on our best friends (even our imaginary ones). Fear increases, as well as our imaginary fears about future events that will never happen. Life for many becomes fragmented and unpleasant. We begin to experience a feeling of hopelessness, worthlessness, and pessimism. The aforementioned is the reaction to focusing on our desires (fantasies) instead of reality.
ÂIn United States 44.3 million people,
18 and olderÂabout 1 in 5 adults,
suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder"
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, mental disorders are common in the United States and internationally. An estimated 22.1 percent of Americans ages 18 and olderÂabout 1 in 5 adultsÂsuffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year. When applied to the 1998 U.S. Census residential population estimate, this figure translates to 44.3 million people. In addition, 4 of the 10 leading causes of disability in the U.S. and other developed countries are mental disordersÂmajor depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Many people suffer from more than one mental disorder at a given time. There is no surprise.
As the rainbow appears to fade away, the beautiful picture is no longer clear. What is now apparent is reality. Reality is tolerable when we accept it. Reality only becomes unbearable when we refuse to accept it. For those who are planning to experience that beautiful rainbow on the horizon, remember that universal statement ÂI want to give my son or daughter those things I never hadÂ.
We must give our children the opportunity to experience healthy dating relationships and embrace reality by encouraging them to focus and live in the moment. Denied were many the opportunities to learn the truth about the harmful effects of fairy tales, fiction, and desires. Countless dating relationships and marriages have ended as nightmares because of a universal misconception, that is, children grow out of everything. Children do not grow out of anything (except clothing) and they just grow into other things. Fairy tales, fantasies, and fiction are vehicles that cause our children to experience gross disappointments in life and destroy any hope of a healthy dating relationship. We must ask ourselves the question; do we want to foster disappointments and blameworthy characteristics in our children? Let us build healthy online dating relationships together. Stay tuned!
BONUS : Online Dating Blogs?
The world of dating has gotten out of hand. They have allowed for women to give us guys seven minutes to win them over in what they call Âspeed datingÂ. So much for foreplay. I mean seriously, whatever happened to the wine me, dine me days of dating.
You would be able to meet a nice girl on line at a grocery store, say something kind of witty then entice the girl to gladly exchange phone numbers. After a couple of phone calls and the getting to know you are not a psycho stage you could then work up to inviting this nice young lady to dinner. All this has changed. Now instead of exchanging phone numbers it becomes ÂAre you on online?Â
At first I was like how impersonal, you would rather stare at my hot pics online then see me in the flesh??? You would rather send me e-mail at 2 OÂclock in the morning than be enjoying cocktails and conversation at the local bar??? What has the world of dating become?
It has become an online dating world. You are actually more likely to meet someone interested in dating on the computer than at the convenience store. This does not mean that you have to go to an online dating service and pay tons of membership fees to pick up ladies but these services almost always guarantee a hook up. You can go the route of the free networking sites but there are no sure things.
Out of my own personal experience the first connection I made in the online dating world was with one of these paid services. I made a profile, and let the women seek me out. This cute Latino girl e-mailed me. I messaged her back, we met, had dinner and some laughs.
It was a home run. Not bad to bat 1.000 as a rookie. I did find though, people solely looking to date through these paid online dating services were really looking for a Âserious commitment.
Think about it, if a girl is going to throw down some money to meet someone, it is not because they want to select their next booty call, they want Prince Charming, The White Wedding and they want to live happily ever after. I personally did not want that kind of pressure or expectations, as I do not like to break hearts so I found a different route.
I signed up for an account at one of the major blog networks. They may as well be called ÂDating BlogsÂ. Not only do you have a great opportunity to meet nice lovely ladies of all races, shapes and sizes but you can do so without having to spend any money. You can browse through all the profiles of ladies meeting your specified search criteria in a radius close to home.
After narrowing down your search you can check out their page which allows the girls to create some pretty interesting sites with music, pictures and all different types of ÂspiritÂ. Here the girls will make you earn their acquaintance but I find that they also are more down to earth. While I havenÂt hooked- up with any of these girls, I have made some good friends that have potential.
While the initial introduction might have moved from meeting a nice girl on line at the supermarket to meeting the girl of your dreams online at the ÂSuper Meat Market of Dating at least the stores in cyber space never close and you can do your Âshopping from home. While there were several pros and con to each type of online service, remember the goal is for the actual date, or is it?