A Publisher S Rant A Checklist Of Items

A Publisher’s Rant – A Checklist Of Items

Assuming you’ve read my rants on articles, you may want a checklist of items to consider for future articles. I am at your service.

Checklist

This checklist is going to be short and to the point. Remember, I’m lazy. Go back and read the original article if you need more information.

1. Headlines – Keyword phrases should ALWAYS be the first words. No exceptions.

2. First Paragraph – No more than 38 words. Two to three short sentences with the keywords from your headline included near the beginning.

3. No one sentence paragraphs.

4. Cut up long sentences into shorter ones. If a sentence is over two lines, it can be cut down.

5. Linking In Article – Don’t. Just do it in the byline.

6. Body Headlines – Break up the article with headlines in the body. Just keep them short and capitalize the first letter of each word.

7. Last Paragraph – Sum up the point of your article. Don’t include links or a plea to go to your site. Use the byline for your begging. I do.

8. Bylines – Keep them under four lines. Try to include the keyword phrases you are using on your site. If you are linking to an internal page of the site, use the keywords on that page, not your home page.

Eight stinking guidelines. Is that too much to ask? I think not! Besides, I’ve already had laser surgery and can’t afford a second session of smelling my eyeballs smoke. Please follow them. If you do, I will publish your articles and so will others.

Despite the tone of these articles, I am trying to help you get more bang for your buck with your articles. Okay, I am also trying to make my life easier, but there isn’t any reason why we can’t both benefit. If you want to get published more often, follow these guidelines. Publishers, webmasters and editors will love you.

The again, I could be wrong.

Okay. Occasionally you can use one-sentence paragraphs.

Just not very often.

BONUS : A Publisher’s Rant – Why I Hate The Body Of Your Article

I’m a publisher for numerous sites. I HATE many of your articles. Here’s why I hate the body of your article and what you can do about it.

You’re Giving Me A Headache

Let’s cut to the chase on this issue. I really don’t care what you write about. As long as it isn’t an overt sales pitch, knock yourself out. I am more interested in the format of the article, not your view or take on the subject matter. The readers on my sites may not like what you write, but that is your problem.

I do care about the flow and format of the body of your article. I strongly encourage you to have a point and stick to it. If another idea comes to mind half way through writing an article, turn it into a separate article. Don’t try to cram it all into one article.

One Sentence Paragraphs

Don’t. For the love of God, just don’t write these. The only time you should write a one sentence paragraph is if it is a narrative. Occasionally, you can write one for dramatic impact, but try to stay away from these.

Loooonggg Sentences

Even in our capitalist society, punctuation is free. This “.” is a period. The period is your friend. For some of you, it is a long lost friend.

Sentences should be relatively short. If you write articles through the stream of consciousness method, good for you. When the masterpiece is done, read it out loud to yourself. How does it sound? Perhaps you should do something with the 10-line sentence?

Linking In The Body

Why, why, why do you do this? I absolutely refuse to publish any article with links in the body. In truth, I don’t have anything against such links. My bitch is that you’re making me take extra steps to hyperlink the damn things when I publish them on sites. If you think I am going to spend extra time on your article, you’re wrong. Chant with me, “I will put all links in the byline.”

Spelling

Contrary to popular opinion, I don’t care if you misspell words. I can’t spell worth a damn and assume you can’t either. I will run your article through spell check programs. In fact, I’ll run them through two spell check programs. Spelling is not a big issue with me.

Body Headlines

Using headlines in the body of your article is a very good idea. I love them and will view you in a more favorable light. The only thing I ask is that you CAPITALIZE the first letter of each word. Remember, I am lazy.

The Last Paragraph

The last paragraph should summarize the point you made in the article. The last paragraph is not a place to put links, hints about your site or your biography. I will not publish your article if you do such things. You can cover all of these items in your byline.

When it comes to the body of your article, knock yourself out. Just keep in mind these pet peeves.